What is forgiveness?

Gambling addiction spurns lies, hurt, lost money, and causes all sorts of harm to relationships. The only cure to this is forgiveness. We want to explain what true forgiveness is, and why it might help you stop being a "stuck dog".

If you don't forgive, then it means you get to hold on to that pain and hurt, and you get to hold it against the other person. But the sad thing is that it doesn't hurt them, it hurts you. Because the feelings are yours, not theirs.

Forgiveness does not mean you ignore what the other person has done, or fail to apply consequences and boundaries. It is simply that you don’t hold what they’ve done against them. 

It takes a lot of guts to forgive. In part II of his video, Ed summarises how you can forgive someone for the hurt they have caused you. 

Forgiveness is cancelling a debt
— Ed Evans

Simply make your statement:

I choose to forgive {name]

for [things they have done]

and I declare that they owe me nothing

You will have released that person and you will be free to step into new things and no longer let it hold you back.

Now that you have forgiven this person, you may need to put appropriate boundaries in place - forgiveness does not mean you accept wrong things happening. 


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